The Viewing

After thinking about it all day I finally decided I wanted to go to the viewing. I am really glad I did. It was nice to see my friend's family and talk to them. I really think they are kind of relieved that she died so they don't have to worry about her anymore and she can finally be at peace. Her brother told me that now their family can finally be at peace and move on.

She was on drugs for approximately 16 years. She would go through brief periods when she would be off drugs, but would always go back. There were many times when she would disappear for months at a time and her family wouldn't know where she was. Her parents were basically taking care of her kids most of the time, and a while back they told her she needed to turn custody of her kids over to them so she did. At least that was taken care of before she died.

The other day when we were going to watch the marathon we had to drive through a neighborhood and we drove right past the house where she and I used to live. I pointed it out to my kids and told them I used to live there. It's weird that we drove by that house on Saturday and I was thinking about her and she died on Saturday.

After Mike and I got home tonight Carson wanted to know where we had been so I told him. I showed him her picture in the paper and told him that she used to be my best friend, but that she had started doing drugs and that she died from doing drugs. I told him that the drugs made her want to take drugs more than she wanted to take care of her children, and that now her two children don't have a mom. I really didn't tell him all of that stuff to scare him, but I really want my kids to know, from the time they're old enough to understand, how bad drugs are and the damage they can do to people's lives.

It's so weird to think that she is dead. I just hope her family can move on and live a more peaceful and stable life and her kids will grow up knowing that she loved them, even though she wasn't always around.